Mile Sur Mera Tumhara

Mile Sur Mera Tumhara  - There's a new 'contemporary' one out.

Update: Watch it elsewhere. It does not even deserve any link-love [yeah yeah the whole world reads this blog :)]

Here's what's wrong with it.

It suffers from a meaningless overdose of movie personalities and then as an after thought near the climax, the olympic medalists are included. I suppose it tries to cater to the current who's who and doesn't want to offend any of them and in the process, they have ended up insulting and offending millions of viewers, who have actually felt something good about it always

If they did want to cater to all the who's who, what about the innumerable people who've been left out?

I simply don't feel that surge of pride that I feel almost without fail when I see the older one, especially near the grand climax when the whole thing builds up to a wonderful crescendo. The new one is just too long and a crescendo like effect does happen somewhere near the beginning when Shankar Mahadevan & Co are seen. Totally incongruous

The old one portrayed beautifully the struggles of a boatman, a washer man, the common man as R K Laxman would put it. The expressions on each of the personalities were so lovely depicted. Just have a look at Kamalahaasan, who appears for mere seconds if you don't believe me. The new one makes us simply see reality through the rose colored glasses of glossy bollywood and I must admit the view is crappy with all the over the top gestures and acting.

Am no musician, but why the heck do they tamper so much with bloody tunes that you don't even feel good when hearing it?

There were parts of the old one, where you almost felt like family, when you really bonded with the persona and places who represented a bit of you in big diverse India. This was the crux of the whole song and the meaning behind the words 'mile sur mera tumhara', and the new one? don't even ask. It's as if all the celebrities are lining up and trying to persuade me (very badly at that) that am still a part of it all! Whoa!

The old one was short, in-tune, in-sync with the times. No one had too much of footage. Even elephants had enough footage. The less said about the new one, the better. It might be in-tune with the times. There is Salman and he's shirtless, but someone please explain to me what that has to do with national integration!


I could go on. Classics are by definition very hard to live upto and it's almost universally accepted that sequels are doomed to fail, and that way this didn't fail (pun!) our expectations.

Here's the one and only 'mile sur mera tumhara' and the 'phir mile sur mera tumhara' (am playing it again)

The magic of statues

Reporter: I hear you are constructing so many statues of yourself all over your state. Isn't that so megalomaniac-al? Can't you use your funds for something better, like say bringing in electricity, water to affected districts?

Politician: Ahambra! Don't level such a baseless charge against me. Whatever I do is for the good of the state, for the good of the people.

Reporter: How so?

Politician: Firstly I am constructing only bare minimum of statues. i.e. one in each street of each city of my state. ok? Secondly many people think I want to construct these statues, so I can leave around my legacy forever, but that is not at all my intention.

Reporter: What might that be then?

Politician: To bring in electricity, to bring in water, to bring in milk to my districts!

Reporter: milk? can you enlighten me further?

Politician: You see our people are idol worshippers. Bring in a deity before them, they will do all that they can. They worship politicians. They worship film stars. They worship larger than life characters and they are very pessimistic, so they will worship anyone above them. They worship idols. They want idols.
So I say, let's give them a idol. Let's give them a living idol, so they know that there is someone who can grant them whatever they worship for, because that living person is in power. So by erecting a statue of me, they will automatically worship it. How will they worship it? With water! With milk! Where will these come from? from the skies? It has hardly rained here! and even if it did, it will not rain milk! So they will find means to transport water and milk. A distribution system will come in place automatically. At night, the idols will still need to be worshipped. yes? So it will be decked up with a 1000 lights. How will you light them up? With AA batteries? The infrastructure will catch up, once you give a reason. A reason for officials to work, a reason for people to demand that the officials work. The statues are the reason! It's a cultural shift in thinking! and ultimately we can go from being a state of poverty to a power-rich state. you get me now??? All this happens how? by erecting a statue!

Reporter: Wow

Politician: I have more plans based on this. I plan to network the statues together using cable, and there will be a webcam on the top of each statue. So people will vie for the attention of the webcam in the hope that the worshipper is being noticed. Ultimately it will lead to technological advancement of each street, each city and each state. Every street in the state will be networked across to every other street. Law and order will then be very easy. We will be able to track criminals from street to street. You get me??? Even the U S A does not have things like this. You level baseless charges against me. I am disappointed with you. A man of such intelligence as you should not join the mob and accuse me thus.

Reporter: I am floored!

Politician: We need people like you. Can you help us making this place a better world?

Reporter: Tell me! Tell me! What do you want me to do? I'll do anything for you, my lord!

Politician: (Smiling gleefully at yet another idol worshipper) Let's see. At the junction of Ambedkar road and Vivekananda Street, they are having some caste issues erecting the statue. One group wants the statue to face one way and the other group wants it to face the other way. Can you proceed immediately there and resolve that issue?

Reporter: ok! but which way should it face?

Politician: Use your intelligence man! It's not important which way it should face, but that it should be there and serve as motivation for people to work!

Reporter: Of course! Am on my way!